


Só tinha que ser com você (it had to be with you)

by dembovert



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Feelings Realization, M/M, Mutual Pining, Short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-31
Updated: 2018-05-31
Packaged: 2019-05-16 16:26:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14814815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dembovert/pseuds/dembovert
Summary: "The idleness of the holidays only served to show the obvious. That was the kind of thing you could spend a lot of time without realizing, but when you start thinking about it you can’t stop. Dele loved Eric."





	Só tinha que ser com você (it had to be with you)

**Author's Note:**

> the title of this fanfiction is in portuguese, because when i was writing [this song](https://open.spotify.com/track/4tb7A6O8cE2UzELRTwU3KZ?si=N2gArsa3TZaYvdU5Vnwbfg) came in and like a click everything fell into place, i recommend you listen and [read the translation](https://www.musixmatch.com/lyrics/Elis-Regina/S%C3%B3-Tinha-de-Ser-Com-Voc%C3%AA-Com-Tom/translation/englishg) to know what i'm saying.  
> __  
> also english is not my first language so i apologize in advance for any mistake and i would greatly appreciate it if you correct me ;)

Dele and Eric were coming back from a few weeks of vacation from the club.

“It was a good time”, Dele said as he closed the door of the cab. "Yeah, it was." Eric said, sitting and resting his head on the back of the car, closing his eyes.

Dele felt that Eric's thoughts were far far away. He knew that Eric had received some opportunities to leave Tottenham and needed to make a decision about it as soon as possible. Dele did not ask - in fact, he tried so hard to pretend that this wasn’t happening because his body trembled and his heart accelerated flashed simply imagining Eric saying that they would no longer be teammates.

Dele always knew that his friendship with Eric was different, but this anxiety of losing him to a German team made him question his own feelings. Dele justified himself by saying that it wasn't passion, was just a very strong friendship, a great admiration and affection for the boy who welcomed him right when he arrived, but his subconscious disturbed him with repeated dreams with Eric.

At first, the dreams were innocent. Finding Eric only on international break, missing his sweet laughter in the dressing room, his long hugs when they were celebrating a goal, but quickly it became something more intense - he dreamed of Eric giving comfort when he was upset, touching his body, calling him gorgeous and kissing every part of his body, pressing his tongue to his parts until he came.

Dele always woke up feeling ashamed, but he hoped to return to the same scene when he slept again.

The idleness of the holidays only served to show the obvious. That was the kind of thing you could spend a **lot of time** without realizing, but when you start thinking about it you can’t stop. Dele loved him.

Despite all this, dele struggled to at least try enjoying holidays. If Eric really left, those would be his last memories together and maybe _just maybe_ his heart would return to normal.

There was one night in which he almost confessed his feelings to Eric.

* * *

_Both of them were sitting on the edge of the pool, their feet dipped, laughing and splashing water on each other. They were a little drunk and the party they were at was already over but they were too lazy to go to their rooms._

_Dele was staring at Eric's body, looking at his blond hair, his unfinished beard, his arms and thinking about how he wanted so badly possess every part of his body and he sighed out loud but loudly. Inevitably the sound made Eric turn around and ask what happened. Dele replied with "oh it was nothing..i am-i...i'm just thinking about nothing" and he turned to the pool, sinking his body. Dele wanted to answer that he was the problem, he wanted to kiss Eric, and he wanted to find out what was going on, he never felt attracted to guys before but why now? And why Eric? Why he was so hopelessly in love with his best friend and couldn’t stop dreaming about him night after night? Dele just rested his head on the edge and let his body dip in the pool._

_Eric stared at Dele. Suddenly all the jokingly tone transformed in a serious tone. Eric always knew how to read Dele perfectly, but at that moment he couldn't read what Dele was feeling. He knew that Dele was hiding something and that made him slightly concerned but he didn't understand why._

_Eric touch his arm and lowered his head to be very close to Dele and ask "Is there anything you're not telling me?" as he ran his hand over Dele's arm, caressing it as a form of comfort._

_Dele didn't answer, only lifted his head and felt the moment was there. He could enjoy it and talk about everything, or let it pass. They were both silent, staring at each other._

_Eric was still trying to understand why Dele was like this, trying to read what was going on. Eric never confessed but one of his favorite things was to examine Dele and watch him walk, talk and doing anything to other people just because he wanted know if Dele acted the same way. Eric knew the connection between him and Dele was different. Sometimes he realized that he wasn't watching but just admiring him, like now, when the worry had become admiration again. Dele eyes were staring at his, both bodies was a mixture of alcohol, chlorine and perfume, his mouth seemed calling his lips. It was a new sensation, Eric had never felt it, maybe it was the alcohol on his body, he thought._

_Dele knew Eric was waiting for an answer, he was staring at him and their faces were too close now. Dele was secreting dare Eric to kiss him. They hadn't been so close, just in Dele dreams or in a celebration with the whole team. So he looked away because he was too afraid to reveal anything. And then, finally, broke the silence by saying "I...I...I just miss the routine, you know? that's all" as he plunged his body into the water to dodge other questions._

_Like a spell break, Eric's mind returned to normal. He hadn't been convicted of his answer, but he accepted in silence._

* * *

The silence of the cab only screamed louder than the feeling the both of them insisted on locking up.

Dele turned to face Eric, who was still with his eyes closed. He was just watching his feature changing with the street illumination shading with Eric's soft, relaxed face.

Dele wanted stretch his arm and stroke Eric's blond hair and he wanted get close to his shoulder and lie down and ask him to not move. He wanted so _badly_ kiss those lips and begging him not go.

Maybe now was the moment to ignore reality, even for seconds, he thought. At worst, he could blame the time zone, he concluded.

Before any movement, he gave a quick glance at the driver, who was really not paying attention to anything beyond the street and finally approached Eric, touching his left hand to Eric's right hand. Immediately, Eric opened his eyes. Dele faced to see if his face changed, but Eric hadn't bothered to the touch, in fact, he took his hand and placed it on his thighs and start to run his fingers tracing his veins.

Dele heart accelerated even more with this, he didn't expect that attitude. Somehow, it reminded him of that night in the pool. He wanted more of this feeling and dare Eric again. This was the push he needed, so he moved closer to Eric, letting his thigh meet his.

"St-Stay," Dele said and approached to Eric's shoulder, talking very quietly so the driver wouldn't hear his words. "Please, don't go to Germany, or to any place. Stay. I want you here." Dele world seemed to freeze after that. Every second was important and he could swear that at that moment he was not breathing.

Eric didn't look at him at first, continued to caressing Dele's hand as quietly started the driver, who still wasn't really paying attention to anything except the street, and them finally turned to Dele.

"Can we talk about it some other time?" Eric then replied. But it wasn't a rude, short or thick answer; her voice was soft and calm. "This isn't the best place," pointing discreetly at the driver.

"No...i want talk about this now." Dele responded as if he had regained his breath again. It was ridiculous because he only asked his friend to stay in London, but he felt as if he had told everything about his feelings. "i don't know if i can take another night with this..sorry."

"What are you talking about?" Eric snapped.

"you...you know..." Dele then said and started to praying and asking to all the gods that exist and existed for Eric remember that night on the pool, when he almost saying his feelings to Eric.

"Are you sure what you're talking? Why didn't you ever tell me before?" Eric answered even lower. His face met Dele face, his gaze passing between Dele mouth and his paralyzed eyes, like a dog begging for something. Dele's breath grew more and more breathless. He tried so hard find the right words - or attitude, but he also didn't want get out of that position he was in.

Unfortunately, that moment was short. They felt the cab stopping and realized they were in front of Eric's house.

Dele pulled away, took his hand from Eric's thighs and shook his head, regretting the last minutes immediately. He leaned his head on the driver's seat and talk "So..my house is only two block from here, can you leave me there too?"

The driver just nodded his head as he opened the door to open the trunk.

"Dele..I.." Eric said as he open the door "can you please come here tomorrow? we'll talk more about it. i promise" He finished, staring Dele, who was pretending to be distracted by his phone.

"I don't know, maybe, to be honest it's not necessary, it's nothing...yeah..nothing." he replied moving the screen looking for an app to open. His words sounded rigid because he no longer wanted show that fragility, he fell that moment it was over.

Eric denied with his head and got out of the car. He thanked the driver while as he tipped.

As the driver got back into the car, Dele raised his head to see Eric for a last time, searching for his keys and entering the house. He stared as the cabbie started and Eric turned to see him for the last time before the car went away.

No matter how big that feeling was or how much he wanted scream and shout to everyone, in football there was a line that couldn't be crossed. Dele thought as he tried very hard to not let the tears fall.

It was not long before Dele came to your house. He picked up his bags, paid and finally entered the house.

As soon he entered, he sat down in the hallway to give a hug to his dog and finally let the tears fall down his face. What had he just done? What did he feel like this? Why would never be able to talk about it clearly?

After some minutes, his phone started vibrating on the floor and turned to see what it was. It was Eric calling, he squeezed in but Eric kept calling. Finally, after five minutes, he stops and his screen blinked with a message from Eric.

"Idiot, it's 3:00am, it's making 10ºC - or less idk. Can you please open your door. i'm freezing."

Dele immediately lifted it; wiped away the remaining tears on his face and opened the door. Eric was there, shaking a little cold with your phone on the right hand.

"what's it? have you forgotten something?" Dele asked, keeping his voice the same way from the last conversation.

"well...you told me you wasn't sleep fine again..so i was not gonna let you sleep without telling me what's fucking going on" Eric replied. "Look...if that's what i'm thinking...just..just talk ok? don't be afraid. you can say anything to me, i will not leave until you speak." Eric concluded as he rubbed his arms together.

Dele thought very hard before answering. Maybe Dele could give a second chance to his heart? After all, Eric was there, waiting for an answer and if anything goes wrong, he could always blame the drowsiness and the time zone.

"But...you...but" Dele try to find the right words "you're leaving anyway..." he said now in a calmer way, shaking his head denying at what he had just said.

"i will not"

"yes, you go"

"if you talk...i will not"

 

Both were in silent again. Dele stared at Eric back, but not like the last time - when he kept challenging Eric to take action - but now showing that he wanted Eric, that was the truth and that regardless of Eric answer, he would know that was the only reason. And there would be no secret between them anymore.

"oh..Dele...you're making it everything difficult," Eric replied. That spell had returned to Eric, that tingling he'd felt in that night at the pool was back. Like Dele, it wasn't long before Eric understood what was really going on between them.

"why?" Dele replied and didn't back away from Eric's eyes, but his heart was beating so fast he couldn't say or thinking anything else.

Eric took a long step to their faces met again. Eric look at every part of his face, smile and analyzing for one last time. Dele was paralyzed but Eric's smile made him tremble. By now, there wasn't turning back, which it was, it was now. If all the romcom movies were right, that was the moment would change everything.

“Well...was that it?” Eric said as he parted Dele lips. Was that what you wanted to tell me? He concluded removing his face from Dele, but still holding his neck.

Dele didn't answer, just pulled Eric for a second kiss. This time, the kiss became something wilder, hot. Dele wanted try it again, he wanted to take all advantage of the situation. He didn't know what would happen tomorrow. Dele pulled Eric into the house and closed the door, puxing Eric to wall. They lips were still together, but their bodies weren't. Eric was now leaning one hand against Dele hair and the runned down is back. Dele did the same. He didn't want stop, he had already suffered too much with his own thoughts during the holidays and it didn't make any sense to move away from Eric. But, unfortunately, the kiss was broken when Dele's dog started jumping on their side.

“Well...that was it”, Dele said as he pushed his body from Eric and turned back to the other room. Eric, still recovering and paying attention to Dele's dog, couldn't hold back the smile of satisfaction on his face. It all made so much sense now.

 * * *

The sun was rising the cold wind made Dele tremble. He wasn’t awake yet but he knew it was too soon. He pulls at his blanket, since he didn’t wanted get up to close the window and realizes that he was trapped with somebody. Dele feels complete for the first time in months. Eric was lying down, sleeping soundly. Dele opens his eyes to turn around and he can’t stop smiling, admiring Eric and remembering what had happened a few hours before. Everything was all fine, because Eric promised he wouldn’t leave as he kisses every part of dele’s body. It was everything okay because they have the same feelings, and he could go back to sleep again.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm also want to thank my talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show-stopping, spectacular friend, Giovanna, for helping me correcting this even if she not interested at all. gio, i love u bby  
> [go see her work!](https://archiveofourown.org/users/submarinebunny/)


End file.
